MIKEY SMITH: 8 wild Donald Trump moments as he keeps World Cup Trophy and plans summer in UK

What's going on with my 'guys', and in some cases, 'gals'?

(Yes, I will be starting the daily roundup in this way for as long as it continues to be funny).

Well, what's been going on in the last 24 hours or so is Trump deciding to keep the World Club Cup trophy and admitting he gets heat from Melania about Putin lying to him.

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Meanwhile, Elmo* is still mad about the Epstein files and Elon Musk is giving everyone an anime girlfriend.

Also, Trump plans to spend an awful lot of time in the UK this summer.

More on all of that and more below. Everything is fine.

*Not actually Elmo.

1. Come on, Football

Donald Trump likes the World Club Cup trophy so much he's decided to keep it.

The deeply weird finger trap of a trophy was brought to the White House in just one of a series of weird transactions between the President and FIFA.

And while online rumours that Chelsea photoshopped the weirdly lurking President out of their victory photo turned out to be nonsense, the team did choose to tweet out an image with him standing right at the back, which was pretty funny.

Anyway, the trophy has been on display in the Oval Office since March for no big reason, and it will apparently stay there for as long as Trump wants.

"I said, When are you going to pick up the trophy? [They said] 'We're never going to pick it up. You can have it forever in the Oval Office. We're making a new one,'" Trump said in an interview with official Club World Cup broadcaster Dazn on Sunday.

"And they actually made a new one. So that was quite exciting, but it is in the Oval [Office] right now."

So Chelsea get a replica, it appears. That's twice as many pinkies under threat from the revolving injury waiting to happen.

2. Trump got humiliated by Putin - and even Melania was piling on

Trump went some way to explaining what prompted his breakup with Vladimir Putin during a meeting with Mark Rutte, NATO's Secretary General.

"My conversations with him [Putin] are always very pleasant. I say, isn't that a very lovely conversation? And then the missiles go off that night," he said.

"I go home, I tell the first lady: I spoke with Vladimir today. We had a wonderful conversation. She said: Really? Another city was just hit."

It's good that Melania keeps so up to date with international affairs.

3. The Epstein story isn't going away. Even Elmo is angry

Elmo, whom Trump frequently threatens to defund, is super mad about the Epstein files.

OK, he's not, but someone hacked his Twitter account and made it sound like he was.

Sesame Workshop, Elmo's friends, said the account had been used to post "disgusting messages, including anti-Semitic and racist posts" - some of which were about the Epstein files.

(Anyone who knows me at all will understand how upsetting I, personally, found this. There's a special place in hell reserved for people who mess with Elmo).

Meanwhile, FBI Deputy Director Dan Bongino is said to have returned to work. He took a duvet day on Friday following a row with Attorney General Pam Bondi over the Epstein Files - and is still very much on resignation watch.

4. BBC man gets rude awakening

Donald Trump woke the BBC's Washington Correspondent up for a semi-impromptu interview.

The interview had been planned for earlier in the day and the call never came. So he took a nap, only to be awoken to Karoline Leavitt's voice saying: "Hi Gary, I'm here with the president, here you go."

5. He is supremely unbothered by not addressing Parliament

Various British blowhards - including Nigel Farage - are up in arms about the timing of Trump's September state visit, which is right in the middle of Parliamentary recess.

(It's also a couple of days too early for Lib Dem conference. Another snub.)

Farage made a little video saying it was "shoddy" that his bezzie mate wouldn't get to speak in Parliament, and branding the timing "cowardly."

He presumably found the timing particularly distasteful because French President Emmanuel Macron got to address both Houses during his state visit last week.

Of course, Suella Braverman, who to many people's surprise is still a Tory MP, rowed in behind Farage.

Asked about it by the BBC, Trump said he was not at all bothered, and had no interest in MPs being recalled from the summer recess to hear him speak.

"Let them go and have a good time," he said.

We are sure MPs are grateful.

6. Trump heads to AI summit as Elon gives Grok users an anime girlfriend

Today, Trump is travelling to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania to attend a summit on Artificial Intelligence.

Meanwhile, his former bestie Elon Musk has been making some waves of his own in the AI space in the last day or so.

Specifically, he's given paid users of his Grok chatbot an anime AI girlfriend.

The new "companions" feature allows users to talk to various AI personas including Ani, a semi-goth girl who I'm reliably informed looks like a character from Death Note.

She has the ability to whisper weird things and has a variety of costumes. Use your imagination.

Also available to chat to is Bad Rudy, a red panda whose sole purpose, as far as I can tell, is to joylessly, aggressively insult the user.

The future, ladies and gentlemen. Mostly gentlemen.

7. Trump is planning to spend a lot of his summer in the UK

As well as his proper state visit in September, The White House has confirmed he's planning a quick jaunt to his two Scottish golf courses later this month.

Keir Starmer will be joining him for a chat at one or other of them - it's currently unclear which.

8. Also, this is pretty yikes

The Department of Homeland Security tweeted this extremely yikes post last night - urging Americans to "Remember your Homeland’s Heritage", and illustrated by a couple of extremely white people, along with their white baby.

As someone in the replies pointed out, the handmaid in the background is a nice touch.

And they didn't mention that the subjects of the painting are, in all likelihood, immigrants holding what Republicans might call an anchor baby. But hey ho.

The White House also apparently misnamed the picture, for what it's worth. The tweet says it's called New Life in a New Land, and by the acclaimed American artist Morgan Weistling.

It is one of Weistling's works, but according to his website it's called Prayer for a New Life.